Why women have affairs?
Chat about a loaded subject that no one wants to talk about, that’s it. Funny thing, married dating have been going on from millennium. Extramarital relationships can be loaded with problems, cause heartache, and other problems. In addition you should wrap your maind around all the other issues, there’s that truth and openness thing, money, age dissimilarity, religious education, remorse, and on and on. I anticipate there will be some strong opinions about some of this.
For the intention of this post I shall define an affair as a long term, maybe weeks long relationship of a sexual nature between two people of whom one or both are married to other persons, discteet married dating.
Why do married people have affairs? There are as many answers as there are seek an extramarital affair. I am sure mainly though it is just the human condition, the need for care, belonging, to be wanted and cared for, the caring for others and wanting to be loved and appreciated. Here are a few reasons I have run across.
Naturally we as humans are all sexual beings. Nature has us set up to reproduce, to have sex. Sex is pleasant and fun, and sex makes us get away the real world for a small period of time. This ecstasy exists for whatever amount of time we are able to keep the adrenalin levels elevated enough. Some people are able to switch the wish on and off, some are brilliant at controlling it and others are so-so at best. Though we all have it, young and old, able bodied and not so able. It is the Human condition. For some of us it is the sex act itself that drives us. For some of us it is the excitement of the hunt. For some of us it is the seduction, for some it is the caring for another being, for some it is the desire to be appreciatedloved, for some it is the total romance thing. These needs and yearnings can be so strong they overcome the taboos society has erected against extramarital affairs. For many individuals the yearnings will overcome their worries and make them risk the rage of not only their relatives, but society too. So why, what is the method?
Sex Addicts, perhaps some of us are. Sex is horribly good, better then drugs, a natural high. If you are in this group of biologically obsessed sex addicts and can find away to have sex and not injure your family or anybody else? You would need to minimize the jeopardy you are taking. If you have the feeling that a good affair is one that is beneficial to everyone, then good luck.
No love at home, or no romance. I think this is the largest group, very big in fact. There are many couples whose marital relationships is over, apart from they are comfy in the way they exist, and upsetting the extended families is not on their list of things they wish to do. You love your other half but there is no romance. Then there are the kids to consider. Your money are so knotted. You need the medical insurance, and so on. There are a lot of reasons to live jointly besides love and sex.
Physical reasons, there are some people who can not have sex. They have physical circumstances that stop them implementing the sex operation, at least not with their spouse. An extra-marital affair sometimes solves the trouble while keeping the marriage whole.
Avoidance, sadly this is a common reason I fear. One or the other, frequently the man is sexually neglecting his female for a number of reasons. As a male I truly am thankful to you guys neglecting your wives and making them obtainable to us males of romance, making them “lonely wives” Though I still think it is despicable that you are neglectful. Also there is the spouse who is neglectful until the wife or husband has an affair, then they condemn them for doing so, when they where the catalyst. Those who neglect, then condemn, are not just neglectful, but malevolent.
Something is just missing in the marriage, I can not put my finger on it, but its not there. Perhaps its romance that is missing, could be it is a shortage of love, maybe caring is disappeared, could be it is the intimacy, could be neglect. Could be we have simply grown apart, our relulas concerns diverged. Maybe it is that what I want, and what I want to do the rest of my ages, is contradictory of what you want. Could be I just do not know what I want from the marriage anymore. Could be, just maybe I miss that emotion that when I am with you, it just feels right.
The ultimate reason people give is, they seek the excitement that is missing and so very much longed for.
There are other reasons, the feeling of power, to escape, for economic gain, for revenge and so on. I am sure there are more reasons why people have affairs then these. I only stop because if this gets too long no one will read it.